you're not anything

You're not anything
you're not worth a thing.

I'm not angry, or vengeful.
I'm hurt and sad and lost.
I'm an emotional wreck, whatever.

It's hard not knowing what may come,
but then again it's an adventure isn't it?
A pure rush of life in your veins,
fear and angst, wonder and lust for living.
But just for a moment, I'd like to feel alright, better than alright.
I want bliss.peace.happiness. Love for what is right there in front of me.

There's just times where I'll see something that should make me happy,
and it just ends up making me feel worse,
because it's not making me happy anymore.
Everything gets lost in my mind,
knotted together, weaved with words that should mean nothing,
mean remarks and sly little comments.

People don't realize that once you're thoughts are out, they can't go back in.
Either way,
You just annoy the living shit out of me, I can't hate you because I don't know you.
But people are just ideas in the end, and I absolutely hate the idea of you.
You're not fucking me up, I know that, don't think I'm that stupid,
and don't ever think you could affect me that much.
We both have our reasons for all of this.
But don't for a second think you can get away with what you're choosing to say about me.
I'm happy for you, now fuck off.


I'm a big girl, and I have a brave face to show the world.
I'm trying really hard to be happy,
I am trying, more than you can ever imagine.